What to Do When Your Alcoholic Spouse Relapses: Steps to Take

What is alcohol relapse?

Alcohol relapse is the process when an individual returns back to consuming alcohol after a period of quitting it. Not similar to lapse, which is a brief and an achievable return to drinking, relapse is a complete return to previous drinking habits, often after a sustained attempt at abstinence.

Relapse can be triggered by a number of triggers, including emotional stress, social situations and environmental factors related to drinking. Some common emotional triggers include stress, sadness, or even positive feelings that can lead to drinking. The condition can be triggered by being around friends or around negative influences which can increase cravings for alcohol.

The procedure of relapse mostly takes place in three stages:

-      Emotional Phase: Unresolved emotions and neglect of self-care can set the stage for relapse.

-      Mental Phase: This phase involves escalation in thoughts about drinking desires, where the desire to drink begins to overshadow a commitment to abstinence..

-      Physical Phase : The actual consumption of alcohol takes place, marking the culmination of the previous stages..

Why is being observant and understanding the triggers crucial?

Observing and understanding triggers are important skills that have important implications for personal and professional development. These skills increase self-awareness, improve social interaction and promote personal well being.

-      Relapse prevention: By identifying triggers, you can avoid risky situations and develop strategies to deal with cravings before they relapse.

-      Emotion regulation: Being aware about emotional triggers helps people deal with the underlying emotions that may lead to drinking, thereby enabling healthier and better emotional management.

-      Support and accountability: Being aware of your triggers can help you facilitate better communication with support networks such as therapists or support groups, which increases accountability in recovery and makes the process smooth.

-      Personalized Recovery Strategies: Everyone's triggers are different and  unique. Monitoring and understanding your triggers can lead to customized recovery plans that address specific risks and make recovery more effective.

Why it is emotionally draining to see your Alcoholic Spouse Relapse?

Seeing an alcoholic spouse relapse can be an emotionally exhausting   experience at multiple levels:

-      Disappointment and failure:When a spouse relapses after a long interval of sobriety, it can feel like a huge disappointment and failure in their recovery journey. One might feel frustrated, depressed and anxious that all their progress is now gone.

-      Worry and Anxiety: Recovery often comes with  unhealthy and risky drinking habits and  behaviors. As their spouse, you may care deeply about their physical and mental wellness.Being concern about their safety and their healthiness can be emotionally draining.

-      The Emotional Roller Coaster:Recovery can bring about an emotional roller coaster. One day you might believe that something that you want will happen when your spouse expresses a new commitment to sobriety, only to be disappointed the next day when he gives in to temptations. The ups and downs of the journey can be emotionally taxing.

-       Support and codependency:To help, some spouses may unwittingly enable their partner's alcoholism by making excuses or protecting them from the repercussions of their behavior. This mutually dependent dynamic can be exhausting and damaging for both people.

 Finding support for yourself, setting strong boundaries, and encouraging your spouse to get back on track with their recovery can help you deal with the emotional emptiness of relapse.

What to do when your alcoholic spouse relapses?

-       Stay calm and supportive: Avoid reacting with anger or frustration. rather, talk to them about your concerns and worries while supporting them. Make your spouse aware about the fact that you are there for them and that relapse is a normal part of recovery.

-      Encourage professional help: Encourage them to reach out to their support network, such as therapists or support groups like Alcoholics Anonymous. Professional guidance can provide them with the tools and strategies  they need in their recovery journey.

-      Consider a trigger: Help your spouse identify what caused the flare-up. Being aware about the triggers can help in avoiding and preventing future relapses. Encourage them to think of it as a learning opportunity, to learn and grow by noticing their patterns.

-      Set Healthy Boundaries:Set clear boundaries to protect your emotional well-being. This may mean limiting exposure to situations that may lead to continued use of the substance.

-      Practice Self-Care:Take care of your mental and physical health. Do activities that bring you joy and reduce stress, as self-care is key during this trying time.

Steps to Take When Your Alcoholic Spouse Relapses?

-      Value Safety and Health:Assess whether your spouse is at immediate risk of serious health consequences of a flare-up. If this is the case, go to the emergency room or contact 911. Alcohol withdrawal can be life-threatening in some cases.

-      Relapse Prevention Plan for Relapse:Work with your spouse and their treatment team to identify triggers, develop coping strategies, and create a plan to prevent future flare-ups. This can include lifestyle changes, stress management techniques and ongoing support.

-      Attend Family Therapy:Contemplate taking family therapy to address the consequences of the relapse on your relationship and overall family go gettings and dynamics. A psychologist can help you and your partner talk about your feelings effectively, set boundaries, and work towards healing.

-      Motivate your partner for continued treatment: Help your partner in reminding that relapse is a normal part of the journey and does not always mean lack of success.Motivating them to walk behind the treatment plan, either it's returning to inpatient care, making additional therapy sessions or attending support groups. 

It's important to remember that relapse does not always mean the end of a recovery journey. With the mandatory support and medical precautions, your spouse can be back on track and carry on with their journey to sobriety.