You are concerned about the uncertainties of your life and that is why you have clicked on this article. Whether you are in a difficult situation regarding the pandemic, or you have just come out of a tough relationship and the world of dating appears to be daunting, or perhaps even starting a new job or finishing high school feels like stepping out of your comfort zone.
You are concerned about the uncertainties of your life and that is why you have clicked on this article. Whether you are in a difficult situation regarding the pandemic, or you have just come out of a tough relationship and the world of dating appears to be daunting, or perhaps even starting a new job or finishing high school feels like stepping out of your comfort zone.
Futuristics is not your only domain; beyond that, you may be powered up to start worrying excessively, which can yield uncomfortable outcomes like; stress, anxiety, psychological fatigue, etc.
If you are constantly looped in “what ifs” read this guide on how to stop overthinking and break out of your pathological, repeated stream of thought. It includes practical advice, soothing strategies and shifts in attitude that will enable you to let go of fear — along with the help you need to live mindfully in the here and now. But now you’re taking control of your mind, training yourself to focus on what matters – one meticulous step at a time.
The host of emotions that led you to this article is of no importance. What’s important is that you are here looking for a solution.
I’m also pleased to hear that as I am certain of what you are experiencing. You spend the majority of your days trying to plan different options and decisions, reliving them over and over in your mind, attempting to piece together a plan that leads to success. And even more crippling, how do I choose the optimal plan that avoids failure? From there, everything only seems to spiral downwards: What if all my choices will lead me to disastrous consequences?
In such situations, we make a lot of irrational choices. You are filled with extreme anxiety on trying to problem solve every possible routing to the future. So you turn to others for guidance, but at the end of the day, you are filled with doubt, no confidence in yourself, and still lost as to what steps to take moving forward.
Fortunately for you, this article will provide you with steps that will allow you to take tangible action towards your anxiety. And it all begins with an extremely simple yet powerful step:
I can imagine the train of thought running through your head. Your automatic assumption, like many others, is ‘this Internet blog guy is telling me to shut the fuck up’ instead of telling me how awesome and amazing I am.’He explains why he is a jerk, a reason that seem as good as any to close this tab- because let’s face it, nobody needs that kind of negativity in their life.
Please allow me to clarify before proceeding. By “shut the fuck up,” I certainly did not mean, “your problems don’t matter, and I don’t want to hear about them.” Instead of that, I was trying to put across, “You’re thinking too much about this. You’re trying to solve an unsolvable equation. As long as you do not stop the racing thoughts that are jamming your mind and try to look at the situation differently, it will worsen.”
Information, concerns, and anxiety are crowding your mind. Nothing that you say or do while in that overwhelmed state will matter; even your actions aren’t going to make a difference. In such a rattled state, you could present the best suggestion to exist regarding any issue, but your nervous brain will tell you:
“What if I’m wrong?
Are you really going to do this? Everything will just get worse!” You will resort back to wanting to yank the skin off your head in frustration over needing to reach a decision.
You may think your problems are exceedingly difficult or impossible, but until you make the decision and take charge of your mind’s control from the Anxious You, the Real You will not be able to achieve optimal decisions.Reflect upon the moments when ‘The Anxious You’ was in control.
Was he able to make good decisions? Did his impact in your life enhance it in any way? Did ‘The Anxious You’ get you out of troubling situations, or did he just amplify feelings of anxiety and depression?
You don’t need to share this with me. I know the answer, and so do you. The anxious version of you is far from an exceptional leader. He isn’t the persona that would guide you towards uncharted territories of happiness and success. Instead, your anxious self will likely lead you to a doom scenario where the harshest realities become your life.
Reclaim control. Give that self-talk a break. You need to stop tiptoeing around the contents of your mind. Instead, close your eyes. Let all your thoughts disappear, calm your mind, and reset your problem-solving skills to zero. Begin with a blank canvas. Erase everything you think and know, all the research, analysis, and conclusions you’ve drawn.
Once done with the previous step, you need to prepare yourself for the following brutal yet enlightening realities.
You do not have knowledge about what the best choice is, and you shall never know. Life doesn’t come with any guarantees. Given any choice, there is a possibility it can be either the best or the worst decision of your life.
You may think of being lost in the middle of a desert, which seems to be an exact replica of your surroundings in every direction. The search for the best solution in a desert is worthless. Just choose a path and set out to explore it. Only the passage of time will reveal whether you made the right decision.
A right choice may be nonexistent but there is certainly a plethora of wrong choices. Sometimes, the wrong one is very obvious and you can clearly see it (and do nothing about it). Other times, there is no discernible mark. When unsure, opt for something that lies beyond your usual routines. Even when the answer turns out to be incorrect, it would still help one grow, obtain vital information, and bolster their determination. The same cannot be expected from selecting answers that are comfortable.
Pursue choices which enable to better yourself. Something new is not always an improvement. Challenging yourself does not have to entail a new job, a new partner, or a completely different attitude. It may or may not happen.
Instead of coping with a hostile boss, why not try to reason with him?
The latter is certainly better than going to another place where one’s issues are likely to remain unchanged. The example of escaping from one toxic relationship to another would be worse than deciding to stay single and work on personal development.
Being lost is a state of mind and feeling confused is completely normal. Life is full of chaos, surprises, and injustices. Acceptance of these complexities will lead you to live a more fulfilling and happier life. You will soon understand that not having answers is ok, because nobody has them.
Me included. Everyone makes choices, and this is where the illusion of control begins. Sometimes luck falls in your lap, and sometimes it doesn’t. The only course of action left is to try one’s best the next time and hope to produce a better outcome from the experience. It is only through having the freedom to make imperfect choices that you will have the ability to make them wisely.
You’re alright. While it may feel like no one truly empathizes with your pain, the reality is that everyone has faced the same situation at some point in their lives. The difference is that they don’t outwardly express their feelings.
If even after all this you are still unable to quiet your mind and stop worrying over making the best decision, here is an idea that can help you. Grab a coin: heads will be one option and tails will be the other. During those split seconds of suspense where the coin spins in the air, your mental hierarchy becomes evident.
It will be crystal clear what action you ought to take. Although you are unsure of which side you want the coin to land on, you are certain which side you’d definitely not prefer.
Now you’re set for the rest of your life. There is always a coin available. A flip can be made anytime. Decisions can be made on the spot. Nothing to fret over. Just embrace the flip and move on to the next. With time, you will learn that making a decision, any decision, is far better than the state of paralyzed anxiety you find yourself in.
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